Wednesday, January 9, 2019

Accepting her award for Best Actress at Golden Globe Awards the other night, Glenn Close gave an emotional and passionate acceptance speech in which she quoted her 80 year old mother as saying “I feel I haven’t accomplished anything.”  

Ms Close went on to acknowledge “Women, we are “nurturers” … but we have to find personal fulfillment!”   

The implication being that personal fulfillment for a woman is not found in nurturing their families … and to me that so sad!

I certainly agree that women should have the freedom to follow their dreams and choose their own role in life — whatever that may be.  Woman should be free and feel respected (and not at all “guilty”) if they choose a career that does not include the traditional roles of wife or mother, or if they choose to combine motherhood with other careers.   

But women should also feel free and be respected if they choose the traditional role of wife and mother as their primary career!  Sadly that does not seem to be the case in our society.  

When I was growing up my mom used to get very upset with women who “apologized” for being “just a housewife”.  "I’m proud of being a housewife” she would proclaim!  For my mom, the role of housewife was a completely fulfilling and full time job.

When we came home from school, Mom was always there, ready to sit down and share a snack.  She was always anxious to hear about our day, and if we had a problem we could tell her.  If we had a question we could ask her.  
And the conversations weren’t limited to after school.  At any time of the day, if we suddenly thought of something we wanted to ask or share, it didn’t matter what she was doing, she would stop and it down and listen.  We knew we could share our stories and our feelings and concerns with her — and she shared her stories and feelings with us. 

From these conversations, and by her example, we learned the tools of life: seeing our own strengths and value;  accepting others as they are and not “judging" them because they are different;  realizing that no one is perfect, not even our mother; recognizing the results of our own choices and understanding the importance of the freedom we have to make those choices.   

The list of all the things I learned from my mother — the “housewife" — would fill several books!  I am so grateful to her and I believe that the world would be much better if there were more “housewives” like my mother!

Our daughters  need to know that they have the freedom to follow any career they choose!   

And they need to know that there is just as much need and importance and respect for women to choosing a career as wife and mother as there is for any other career!

I wish Ms Close, at the Golden Globes, would have followed up her comments with a thank you to her mom, publicly recognizing her mother’s contributions to her own successful life.   

And I hope that Glenn's mother was able to look at her daughter standing there on the platform, and say with pride,  “I did accomplish something very worthwhile!"